This experience continues to mold me and shape anything that I write. There’s a bit of that romantic writer in me that has felt the need to find closure. But last night, feeling everything that I love about this scene in the sound of Underworld, I’m reminded again that this moment continues to evolve, and as long as I’m able to stay up past midnight on occasion, I’m still a part of it.
But I think more people can relate to that younger version of me, going deeper into that world. That curiosity, experimentation, fearlessness. That desire to be cool, to belong, to know. That drove me then, and it’s those very human traits that drove this journey.
It was a world in which we truly played with technology — where the field was level, and where everyone, no matter who they were or where they were from, had access to it. I came back to this place each weekend, as if returning to a womb to be reborn as an upgraded being — to interact in a frictionless realm where we allowed machines to manipulate our bodies like yo-yos, and where we responded to their maternal calls.
For ten years, I’ve reshaped the story in my head into something so special, so grand. It’s a dangerous thing for a writer-who-isn’t-writing to do.
Early in the morning, as I peaked on the dance floor of the main room, a dancer threw his glow stick in the air, and I watched it rise — in slow motion — and recalled the beginning of 2001: A Space Odyssey. This guy was like a caveman, and his glow stick was the fragmented piece of bone that the man-ape in Stanley Kubrick’s film flung into the sky that spun and transformed into a satellite in orbit.
But like a mentor once told me, every moment of writing counts. This is a window into this world that will soon close forever, my mentor told me, so just write. Write it all. Write what you remember, what you felt, what you wanted. Ten years later, I have 161 pages of this specific perspective on this specific moment, now staring back at me.
After a recent conversation with my husband, I realized that our tiny house is the bastard child of these two very different dreams. Built on wheels, with a traditional facade and an interior with bits of modern design, the house is a confused byproduct of two goals and two lifestyles — and a symbol of my fragmented self.
Snapshots from England over the holidays in 2015, from London to Kent. It was gray and wet — and kinda gloomy, to be honest — but it was nice to spend time with family, and to explore London and see friends.
Living tiny has been a learning experience so far: in some ways, it’s exactly what I expected, but I’ve also been quite surprised by what each day brings — and what I continue to learn about myself, my preferences, and my limitations. Paring down and navigating in such a small space — 131 square feet — has reset me and pushed me to think about what I truly need and want. I’ve never experienced such a blank slate before, from which I can design and experiment with a different routine.
Exploring Paris in December, in the days before Christmas. It was lovely to return, to unravel a bit, and to spend time with friends for five days.